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 Post subject: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 8:40 pm 
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Over the years there have been numerous issues discussed on the forum relating to both physical and mental health well-being, including topics such as depression, anxiety, OCD, bereavement and insomnia. Privately, people have contacted me for information on alcohol dependency, unwanted pregnancy, terminations and drug abuse. Everyone is affected by their own or someone elses physical/mental health at some time, and it might be useful to have a dedicated sticky topic to share any useful information, views on treatments, experiences, phone numbers, helplines etc.
Please be respectful.... :wink:


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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 9:51 pm 
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nuttymate wrote:
Over the years there have been numerous issues discussed on the forum relating to both physical and mental health well-being, including topics such as depression, anxiety, OCD, bereavement and insomnia. Privately, people have contacted me for information on alcohol dependency, unwanted pregnancy, terminations and drug abuse. Everyone is affected by their own or someone elses physical/mental health at some time, and it might be useful to have a dedicated sticky topic to share any useful information, views on treatments, experiences, phone numbers, helplines etc.
Please be respectful.... :wink:


Therein lies the paradox I am afraid Ma'am.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Tue Aug 26, 2014 11:00 pm 
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Rozza wrote:
nuttymate wrote:
Over the years there have been numerous issues discussed on the forum relating to both physical and mental health well-being, including topics such as depression, anxiety, OCD, bereavement and insomnia. Privately, people have contacted me for information on alcohol dependency, unwanted pregnancy, terminations and drug abuse. Everyone is affected by their own or someone elses physical/mental health at some time, and it might be useful to have a dedicated sticky topic to share any useful information, views on treatments, experiences, phone numbers, helplines etc.
Please be respectful.... :wink:


Therein lies the paradox I am afraid Ma'am.


I find that two tablets with water helps a lot.

Is this a serious sub-forum or what - I am not going to pour out my feelings in open forum unless it is from the result of alcohol, spite or anger related. :wink:

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2014 7:15 am 
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Still lots of taboo subjects especially the Mental side of illness but strides taking place.

Many of us exercise our bodies to keep in shape but forget to focus the mind into relaxation.

Stuff like Yoga can be so important.

Maybe diet is any easy introduction,

List a days food, many wouldn't have a clue as to the calorie count and how much work required to burn those totals.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Wed Aug 27, 2014 10:48 am 
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Start from within - self compassion. A great website filled with information is http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk


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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Mon Sep 08, 2014 10:11 pm 
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The human mind is a complex thing, that big lump of grey matter has a lot to deal with. I do let work pressures get to me, because I despise my job, and certain people who are screwing me around, and my get-out is alcohol, get numb, forget. Bollocks. I'm pissed off, because after a few years of training for a Marathon, being fit, having a goal, and so on, work has got on top, I can't train now, and I need to move on after 15 years in the same company, the same company now abusing the good will of employees, big time. I'm a pretty laid back decent bloke and Dad, as some folk on here will testify, but by Christ if I could get away with banjoing this one slimy weasel of a cu** at work, I would.

Maybe I need to visit a Temperance Inn with Mr Born, as he seems to have found the way to enlightenment. Yoga? Why not, I've tried Salsa Dancing :wink:

Joking aside, this is all insignificant, when you consider Pogue's situation.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Sep 13, 2014 8:38 am 
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Embers wrote:
The human mind is a complex thing, that big lump of grey matter has a lot to deal with. I do let work pressures get to me, because I despise my job, and certain people who are screwing me around, and my get-out is alcohol, get numb, forget. Bollocks. I'm pissed off, because after a few years of training for a Marathon, being fit, having a goal, and so on, work has got on top, I can't train now, and I need to move on after 15 years in the same company, the same company now abusing the good will of employees, big time. I'm a pretty laid back decent bloke and Dad, as some folk on here will testify, but by Christ if I could get away with banjoing this one slimy weasel of a cu** at work, I would.

Maybe I need to visit a Temperance Inn with Mr Born, as he seems to have found the way to enlightenment. Yoga? Why not, I've tried Salsa Dancing :wink:

Joking aside, this is all insignificant, when you consider Pogue's situation.


I guess you suffer the job that you detest so that you can pay your mortgage and if I am correct then, this is what I hate about having to live to work in a job that gets you down. The secret, if you're lucky enough to discover it is YOUR exit off that treadmill and finding something where you can be content if not happy and still pay the bills.

After I left the Army I tried hard to get a local job in North Herefordshire and settle down, but I had left the Army on £14k and my mortgage/budget was fixed to that amount. The amount of money my Wife earned back then in 1988 as a qualified book-keeper was £5k per annum out there in Leominster. I had to turn down jobs because the salaries were around the £10k mark which would have put me in debt.

I had to make a compromise and go back on the circuit that I had said I wouldn't do hence, I ended up in South Africa and after that stint, had to go and work in London where my Wife's earnings trebled. However, this would have been around the early 90's in yet another recession where jobs were hard to come by even in London. Bosses knew this and often took advantage of their employees and why is that there is always one senior Bastard that all of the middle managers know is no good for the company, but the Managing Director is the last one to click on the fact. That Bastard Director with 1 share in the company was responsible for so many sackings and resignations it was unbelievable.

Although I was fairly safe from getting the sack, I simply couldn't afford to resign without first getting another job so had to stick it out, but OMG how is depressed me. I stuck it out for 4 years before the opportunity came for me to go back to Russia on a very healthy tax free salary. It cost me my marriage which had been spiralling down for years, but I did get off that treadmill so to speak and found relative contentment with lots of happiness in between.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Sep 13, 2014 1:29 pm 
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10 years ago, we thought it was time to move on up, from our first house, where we were very happy. A year or so later, we had our Joe, and two good wages became one, but we moved and tripled our mortgage. At the time, it was a sellers market, but we're now looking to downsize, to try and cut two thirds off the £99K we owe, but it's a buyers market. The plan is to give us more breathing space, and me the option to get another job, which would likely be a lower wage. I earn a decent wage, but I hate my job, and would gladly earn less if it meant doing a job I enjoyed. I'd like to do something for myself, but alas, I don't have an entrepreneurial spirit.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Sep 13, 2014 1:45 pm 
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Embers wrote:
10 years ago, we thought it was time to move on up, from our first house, where we were very happy. A year or so later, we had our Joe, and two good wages became one, but we moved and tripled our mortgage. At the time, it was a sellers market, but we're now looking to downsize, to try and cut two thirds off the £99K we owe, but it's a buyers market. The plan is to give us more breathing space, and me the option to get another job, which would likely be a lower wage. I earn a decent wage, but I hate my job, and would gladly earn less if it meant doing a job I enjoyed. I'd like to do something for myself, but alas, I don't have an entrepreneurial spirit.


Downsize asap in my opinion, once you get that Yoke from around your neck of that fookin £90K mortgage that you'll end up paying (quick absolute wild guess) over £300k for over the 25 year period.

Once that Mortgage is gone or drastically reduced, the rest falls into place. Yeah, on the one hand, you have equity to pass down to your lad, but why suffer for 40+ years paying through the nose to put a roof over your head and set him up, I got and will probably get fook all from my suffering as a kid so my Father could work all hours to pay for a detached house we really shouldn't have been able to afford. I often say that we would have been better off in a Council House, but my Mother wanted her detached 3 bedroom house that she was never happy in anyway. Swings and roundabouts - I guess.

Look up Tiny Houses on You Tube and see how it is possible to live in comfort in minimum space.

We all have the Entrepreneur element inside of us, trouble is, often it is shit or bust without a safety net. I'd place a bet that if you won the lottery, you'd realise your dreams of opening that real ale pub or whatever. :wink:

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Sep 13, 2014 2:27 pm 
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Moscow Wolf wrote:
Embers wrote:
10 years ago, we thought it was time to move on up, from our first house, where we were very happy. A year or so later, we had our Joe, and two good wages became one, but we moved and tripled our mortgage. At the time, it was a sellers market, but we're now looking to downsize, to try and cut two thirds off the £99K we owe, but it's a buyers market. The plan is to give us more breathing space, and me the option to get another job, which would likely be a lower wage. I earn a decent wage, but I hate my job, and would gladly earn less if it meant doing a job I enjoyed. I'd like to do something for myself, but alas, I don't have an entrepreneurial spirit.


Downsize asap in my opinion, once you get that Yoke from around your neck of that fookin £90K mortgage that you'll end up paying (quick absolute wild guess) over £300k for over the 25 year period.

Once that Mortgage is gone or drastically reduced, the rest falls into place. Yeah, on the one hand, you have equity to pass down to your lad, but why suffer for 40+ years paying through the nose to put a roof over your head and set him up, I got and will probably get fook all from my suffering as a kid so my Father could work all hours to pay for a detached house we really shouldn't have been able to afford. I often say that we would have been better off in a Council House, but my Mother wanted her detached 3 bedroom house that she was never happy in anyway. Swings and roundabouts - I guess.

Look up Tiny Houses on You Tube and see how it is possible to live in comfort in minimum space.

We all have the Entrepreneur element inside of us, trouble is, often it is shit or bust without a safety net. I'd place a bet that if you won the lottery, you'd realise your dreams of opening that real ale pub or whatever. :wink:


Real Ale pub, next to my Dirty Dingo's Love Ranch.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 1:18 pm 
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Embers wrote:
The human mind is a complex thing, that big lump of grey matter has a lot to deal with. I do let work pressures get to me, because I despise my job, and certain people who are screwing me around, and my get-out is alcohol, get numb, forget..


Just wondered how things were Mr Embers...
Did you look at any self help stuff re managing stress?


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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 4:14 pm 
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nuttymate wrote:
Embers wrote:
The human mind is a complex thing, that big lump of grey matter has a lot to deal with. I do let work pressures get to me, because I despise my job, and certain people who are screwing me around, and my get-out is alcohol, get numb, forget..


Just wondered how things were Mr Embers...
Did you look at any self help stuff re managing stress?


I thought he just drank more real ale Nutty! :wink:

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Sep 21, 2014 7:23 pm 
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Moscow Wolf wrote:
nuttymate wrote:
Embers wrote:
The human mind is a complex thing, that big lump of grey matter has a lot to deal with. I do let work pressures get to me, because I despise my job, and certain people who are screwing me around, and my get-out is alcohol, get numb, forget..


Just wondered how things were Mr Embers...
Did you look at any self help stuff re managing stress?


I thought he just drank more real ale Nutty! :wink:


Real Ale, proper English Cider or Wine. I rarely touch spirits, special occasions only, as that really is the road of no return. To answer your question missus, I'm stuck at the mo, and am sitting at my laptop, getting in the right frame of mind to get my CV right, and uploaded to Jobserve. However, the one thing I've found in my life, is that as long as I try to make something happen, something always seems to turn out for the good. I don't believe in God, but I do believe in fate.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Sep 27, 2014 5:48 am 
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Me too

I call it "Windows of Opportunity". No matter who you are, in your life a window of opportunity will open. The trick is recognising the window and having the balls to jump through.

Through life, keeping an open mind allows you to see windows, which if you live with blinkers, you will never notice. Having the guts is the difference between the top echelon and the also rans, but you don't have to be one of the big boys, as smaller windows are always there; self-confidence the real issue to make a difference in your life.

To me, that is why folk who beat children into submission, rape women, bully, or anything that denies or takes away a fellow human being's self-confidence, deserve the full censure of the society they live in. Groups like ISIL who do all of the above and more, hold back civilisation and should be wiped from the planet.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Aug 15, 2015 7:11 am 
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You know your own worst nightmare, what happens if it comes true.

Last week my little grandson ( just turned two ) was diagnosed as autistic. I tell you what thats painful.

He can't speak and most of the time you would think he was perfectly normal.

I take him everywhere, he loves the football pitch, he races from one goal mouth to the other then back again.
When I show him different football movements he belly laughs.

He loves his Slide he also loves his sand pit, he will support the Wolves you know.

I hope this little story helps you find some perspective in life............

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Aug 15, 2015 11:43 am 
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He is at least responding well to you, from the sound of it; some autistic people can't at all. The early diagnosis is also a plus, although it might not seem like it.

Music therapy can often improve interaction and quality of life. I recently stumbled across this charity: http://www.nordoff-robbins.org.uk/ which looks interesting. If you are musical yourself, or somebody else in the family is, you could maybe do it yourselves, but as much as possible it needs to be actual people playing the music, to provide the interaction. It's just something that might help.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Aug 16, 2015 7:18 am 
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Thanks for that Nibbs, very interesting.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Aug 16, 2015 5:48 pm 
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He's a little fella to be proud of KK, and I can tell you are....
As Nibbs said, that early diagnosis counts for so much. I've just done a bit of learning with the National Autistic Society, and there are many undiagnosed folk who get to adulthood then wrongly considered to have a mental illness....
Enjoy the belly laughs...


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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Aug 16, 2015 7:22 pm 
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Have a word with Suiging.....he can maybe give you some does and don't.I'm sure whatever difficulty may arise a loving caring family always helps.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Fri Aug 21, 2015 10:43 pm 
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I think that I only managed my first steps at two years of age so if he is running from goal to goal then that is some achievement. He ain't Dave Edwards in disguise is he. :wink:

You'll no doubt get the best out of this Grand-child; awareness of such conditions are far more accepted and understood than in the past, but we're still learning.

I thought your Lad was playing football out in Australia or do you have more than one child then?

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Nov 01, 2015 8:32 pm 
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As the man said, the early the diagnosis the better.

There are huge differences between the many shades that are covered by the term autism. They are making strides in many areas, such as food allergies and early intensive learning and socialization therapies

At the end of the day, you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your family. Like it or not, you have to stick with what you're dealt, the sooner you know what challenges are going to lie ahead, the quicker you come to terms with them and this will allow you to enjoy the ride.

Hope for the best, but mentally prepare for something a tad more challenging.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Wed Nov 25, 2015 11:23 am 
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nuttymate wrote:
Over the years there have been numerous issues discussed on the forum relating to both physical and mental health well-being, including topics such as depression, anxiety, OCD, bereavement and insomnia. Privately, people have contacted me for information on alcohol dependency, unwanted pregnancy, terminations and drug abuse. Everyone is affected by their own or someone elses physical/mental health at some time, and it might be useful to have a dedicated sticky topic to share any useful information, views on treatments, experiences, phone numbers, helplines etc.
Please be respectful.... :wink:

Just seen this for the first time - excellent idea.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2015 1:09 am 
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SELWolf wrote:
nuttymate wrote:
Over the years there have been numerous issues discussed on the forum relating to both physical and mental health well-being, including topics such as depression, anxiety, OCD, bereavement and insomnia. Privately, people have contacted me for information on alcohol dependency, unwanted pregnancy, terminations and drug abuse. Everyone is affected by their own or someone elses physical/mental health at some time, and it might be useful to have a dedicated sticky topic to share any useful information, views on treatments, experiences, phone numbers, helplines etc.
Please be respectful.... :wink:

Just seen this for the first time - excellent idea.


I think any shared experience is useful for others. From yoga, to bunions, stress, or caring for the elderly.

I've recently been practising 'Mindfulness' much more after attending some refresher courses. There are lots of free apps on phones if folk want them.
It takes loads of practise to get good at it, but it can be useful for everyone and is having a bit of a 'reincarnation' within services at the moment. If anyone tries it let us know what you think!


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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2015 1:23 am 
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nuttymate wrote:
SELWolf wrote:
nuttymate wrote:
Over the years there have been numerous issues discussed on the forum relating to both physical and mental health well-being, including topics such as depression, anxiety, OCD, bereavement and insomnia. Privately, people have contacted me for information on alcohol dependency, unwanted pregnancy, terminations and drug abuse. Everyone is affected by their own or someone elses physical/mental health at some time, and it might be useful to have a dedicated sticky topic to share any useful information, views on treatments, experiences, phone numbers, helplines etc.
Please be respectful.... :wink:

Just seen this for the first time - excellent idea.


I think any shared experience is useful for others. From yoga, to bunions, stress, or caring for the elderly.

I've recently been practising 'Mindfulness' much more after attending some refresher courses. There are lots of free apps on phones if folk want them.
It takes loads of practise to get good at it, but it can be useful for everyone and is having a bit of a 'reincarnation' within services at the moment. If anyone tries it let us know what you think!


I'll give anything a go once, and I'd give this a go, if it's going to bring me some peace and enlightennment. I'd give Yoga a go, but with me knackered knees, no chance that I'd get me leg round me yed. Tantric sex would leave me buggered n'all.

Keep us posted Missus, as your mindfulness develops, especially if it's positive.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2015 6:13 pm 
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I already know its positive Mr Embers.... I think the main issue is getting folks to try it.
People get used to being stressed and tense, and are a bit scathing about meditation/relaxation etc. I used to do proper mediation years ago...but then I got married :roll:
But honestly, just to have 5 minutes in the day being 'mindful' is better than nothing.

My favourite is to sit in a chair, close your eyes.
For a few moments just 'notice' how your body feels in the chair, where the pressure is, does anything feel tense....as soon as you get a thought just let it go. Then listen to and feel your breathing, how your chest moves....
If any thoughts other than how it feels come into your mind just re-focus and let the thoughts go.
Then listen to any sounds in the room, the clock eg, and focus on the sounds in the room.
Listen to noises outside the room, a telly somewhere, or a car outside. If you think 'noisy bastards' don't engage with the thought but just let it go and focus on the noises again.
Work through this for a couple of minutes, and then do it all in reverse....ie outside, in the room, breathing, and how your body feels in the chair.

Try it....and practise!!


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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2015 11:43 am 
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I does my thoughtfulness during my morning coffee with a smoke out on the terrace or when I can, I go down in the valley with a can of beer and while away some quiet moments.

However, my best most creative ideas always comes after I've had a few to drink and left with my own thoughts. I've tried self meditation, self hypnosis, but I cannot get it to work for me as perhaps it should.

Not really sure what 'Mindfulness' is though. :?

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2015 12:35 pm 
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''Mindfulness is a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations''....

So it's not really 'thinking' to any degree...there's no problem solving or planning or chewing things over, it's more about 'noticing' but then letting the though go, as most of our thoughts seem to be base on 'how did that happen?....what if this happens?...when do I do that?... I'm pissed off... I'm angry...etc etc'.
Some clients are finding image of clouds useful....as you notice the feeling/thought visualise it on a cloud and float it away. Others find images of rivers useful.
I find all that too feckin difficult, but benefit from just focusing on 'here and now' before I get back on the hamster wheel. Most folks stress is about whats already happened or whats to come....

Mr Moscow, we know we are both inclined to reach some kind of 'mental state' after a tipple :wink:

http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anx ... lness.aspx


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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2015 1:13 pm 
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Hey Nutty. Do you think it might help if I sat and noticed how your chest moves? I'm willing to give it a go I suppose.

Seriously though, I have felt quite stressed of late and really when I analyse it is a simple pride thing. If I do just sit and focus on now and let everything drift it does seem to reduce the tension.

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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2015 1:28 pm 
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Great stuff Mr Left back....
It's far too easy to stress about tomorrow.....so try not to analyse but just 'notice' now, at this moment.

I definitely noticed in a recent class, despite feeling 'ok', how physically tense I was. My frown lines relaxed so much I had wrinkles round my knees....

Anyone else going to try it? Let us know how it goes and what works for you....

(and by the way, my chest doesn't move much :lol: as I'm well practised in diaphragmatic breathing :wink: )


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 Post subject: Re: HEALTH & WELLBEING
 Post Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2015 4:32 pm 
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nuttymate wrote:
Great stuff Mr Left back....
It's far too easy to stress about tomorrow.....so try not to analyse but just 'notice' now, at this moment.

I definitely noticed in a recent class, despite feeling 'ok', how physically tense I was. My frown lines relaxed so much I had wrinkles round my knees....

Anyone else going to try it? Let us know how it goes and what works for you....

(and by the way, my chest doesn't move much :lol: as I'm well practised in diaphragmatic breathing :wink: )


Missus, if Leftie concentrated on your bangers, his blood pressure would go through the roof :lol:

I really envy glass half full folk, who can always see the positive side of things. I am deffo going to try and change my outlook on things, and try to enjoy the simple things in life more, and booze will be a treat, not a way of life!

Leftie alludes to his pride, in the workplace, and I think I know where he's coming from. Work is a means to an end, for most of us, and we have to put up with some slefish bastards who have their own ambitions and agendas, and use their colleagues as stepping stones. However, I don't think they're happy people.

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